Quote Challenge

“Holding on to anger, resentment and hurt only gives you tense muscles, a headache and a sore jaw from clenching your teeth. Forgiveness gives you back the laughter and the lightness in your life.” – Joan Lunden


One more to go.

I disagree. Anger and resentment, yes, but not the forgiveness part. Forgiveness relieves you of all those symptoms, but sometimes there is no laughter and the lightness does come back, but in a different quite and it’s never quite the same.

(On the anger and resentment part, I think some villains would beg to differ.)

I don’t like to hate. I don’t think I really hate anything. Do I dislike people and things? Oh yes, yes, I have many dislikes. I dislike it when people break off agreements without warning (hypocrite here, but I am speaking of a few particular instances and I have clear targets in mind when I’m speaking of this), when some people let their imaginations run too far, when people can’t read atmospheres (I avoid reading them at all and just stay silent), when people assume that I’m a good punching bag and many more.

I think what I really hate sometimes is being a human. I think life is great, but being a human makes me not want to be a human sometimes. I think I’m getting over that, so that’s good.

I hated my parents at one point and while I’ve definitely let all the “anger and resentment” go and there’s laughter, I don’t quite see the lightness. I think that I can can simply see things a bit more clear, but are there new colors? No. Not that there ever will be, of course.

Perhaps this quote wasn’t meant for me. Hmm.

Quote taken from here.


2 thoughts on “Quote Challenge

  1. Anonymous says:

    Personal opinion: I disagree with both parts of the statement. While I don’t in anyway condone hate and resentment and revenge and all that stuff (unless it’s revenge for some stupid prank }:) ) I don’t think hate does any of that stuff: headaches and sore jaw and whatever. Sometimes I think it is simply our way of running away from the fear of being hurt. Rather than being in and of itself an emotion, it’s more like a cloak for the scarier emotion. And I think forgiveness takes a lot of time and weariness and acceptance, but what’s left behind is, as you say, never quite the same as if it hadn’t happened at all. Actually, I think there would be no point to the pain if you got everything back, if you didn’t learn something, change in some way. It’s not always for the better, I admit. ahaha. but I guess as a Christian I don’t really believe in pointless pain. For every joy that’s lost comes an opportunity of some sort. It’s kind of like what I was saying to my mom earlier today: I’m not happy that I broke and dislocated my wrist and had to have it rebroken and set, because it hurt beyond what I can properly describe, but I think it was, in some ways, a good experience, teaching me a little bit more about pain, not to belittle it and also as a writer, to know how to express something of that magnitude (lots of stories make it sound like breaking a bone is just like “shi– it hurts, but I have to keep going.” when really it’s more like. you can’t think anything at all and all the colors go really bright and the rest of the world starts swirling around you and it hurts so much you can’t even cry… but I digress). For me personally I think I’ve finally managed to forgive myself and the other people in my life who’ve brought me pain, and in some ways it’s been those experiences that I treasure the most, but at the same time, forgiveness or not some of that pain remains and it makes me afraid to try to love anyone new, whether as a friend or as a romantic partner. I spent two years just in a haze of emotional pain not paying attention to the people I loved and sometimes I do go back to hating myself for neglecting them when they needed me, and so finding new people, especially in this time of transition, is so so frightening. I used to think that when I cut off the person I thought I loved, he took some part of me with him, that capacity to love anyone at all. and for a short while I felt like I couldn’t love anyone. and that was scary too, and in that way there’s no way to win, but I think that with forgiveness comes some measure of peace, (ramble ramble. okay, my ramble ramble time is done. sorry, akari-chan, don’t post this if you don’t want to) which is what makes it worthwhile.

    • You are one of the most amazing people I know. Just thought I’d let you know. Experiences harden us, yet it’s also experience that prepares us for the possible.

      Taking that first step is so very risky; the thought of going through the past again is a terrifying one, but isn’t that what life is? A series of bets, but no matter what bets you make, we all eventually end up at the same destination.

      We only have so much time, so why not?

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